The Body (2016) drawing took a year to complete and is the first in the series of three. It began weeks after my father’s death; the last mark was made on May 17th, 2017 the anniversary of his sudden passing. After he died I suffered emotional waves I could not control except by drawing. The powerful emotions were a signal that something was struggling to be born.

            I learned that when we live a trauma, adrenaline actually burns a memory into our brain, as I was drawing I was actually reliving it, the strong emotions were a manifestation of the initial trauma. The grieving process initiated the healing process. I entered into a timeless state; a great reservoir outside time and space began to flow out of my pen.

            What happened in the past was manifesting in the present in different forms and situations. This proved to me that trauma locks our life to a pattern. The body has an instinct toward healing. It was releasing the trauma stored within it to process it, release it. The problem with trauma is that we block it out of our memories. Therefore it is difficult to know that we have been through a traumatic experience, or be aware that a particular behavior comes from this trauma. Through this process of releasing trauma by drawing where it is stored in the body. I was able to see through the world (physical) to see life with a complete transparency.

            The toll of this creation was frightful; at certain points I thought it would destroy me. I came to see that clamor inside me has the same hysterical pitch as the outside (world). It is the world turning itself inside out. One can see the skeletal bones reaching out to grab hold of something that is not there. The twisted guts full of poetry and pain. The posture is a reflection of the times, this feverish agitation, this mad tempo, this inability to hold it in until the germ is ready to blossom, searching frantically for it’s missing genitals.

            After going through this process I was able to localize all the parts in my body where the trauma was stored. I thought it would be a portrayal of the trauma I lived. What I discovered was a map of the common features within us all.
            The drawing was made intuitively. Its creation teaches us about the trauma of past generations, which knew violence and war. It speaks about today, how we are conscious of it, how we want change. The pain of the past is still in our blood. Like the creation of the drawing we have to work hard, be courageous in the face of our fear, continue with faith, follow our way, and learn to listen to our body. The body is our teacher.